I am at peace with my mother’s death and I still feel her presence at times since her passing a few years ago. I imagine having conversations with her from time to time, and last week in my thoughts, she reminded me of a time when I was 7 or 8 years old when I accidently killed a small bird in a friend’s back yard while I was playing. I still remember my mother’s empathy and compassion when I went to her in tears with what I had done. She held me, was supportive and kind, and helped me to gently take care of the bird’s lifeless body. In my imagination, she reminded me of this memory because many of my memories of my mother are not so kind and supportive, and I remember those memories clearly of fights when I was a teenager, or avoiding her anger when I was a child.
Through my adult years I worked to heal my relationship with my mother, and when she died I wanted to support her in her transition as best as I was able. I was with her in the ER when the doctor told her that her cancer had returned and I remember her looking at me with fear in her eyes as she apologized for all the times when she had acted poorly as a parent. I helped move her and my father to a nursing facility in her final days and helped care for her during that time. I was with her when she took her final breaths, and as she passed, some of my brothers and I were singing “Amazing Grace” to her because she wanted us to “sing her over” to the other side when her time came to go.
Whenever I think of my mother now, I feel the peace of heaven surrounding her and I feel the joy of our loving connection across space and time. I would not trade this peace of mind for anything. This inner peace is the pearl of great price and when I reflect on the beautiful and remarkable relationships I have in my life with my wife and children, my family and friends and, yes, with my mother, I feel this peace, and I know I am blessed.
We are all just different aspects of the One, experiencing itself from different points of view, and when I look on the people around me, I see an expression of the infinite love of God looking back at me. I know everyone has their fears, their emotional problems and their ego baggage, but they are all, every one of them a good person with their own hopes and dreams with someone who loves them and sees the good in them. They love and struggle and feel just as I do. Seeing past people’s emotional baggage to their core I see the divine reflected back at me and again I know I am blessed to be constantly surrounded by the reminders of the overwhelming love of Spirit in the faces of everyone I meet.
From this point of view, heaven is not a time or a place, but is a state of mind where you allow the shift in your perception that comes when you release your fears and your ego-based thinking and open your mind to the infinite love that is within you and around you here and now where it always has been. When you let go of your fears and find the core of your being, your will find love. When you learn to hold your center in the face of your life challenges and the difficult relationships in your life, you will begin to see past the fears and the ego baggage of others in your life and see the basic goodness in those around you, and there you will find the peace that passes understanding. It is within you now and it is all around you if only you are willing to let go of the fears of your past and release the expectations of your future and become fully present here and now.
If you want to begin to practice some steps to expand your ability to hold your center and increase your clarity and emotional freedom, here’s a link to the three step process of self-reflection where you begin to practice recognizing and releasing your fear-based thinking.
https://centerpointfs.org/self-reflection
If you want to join our training on how to better hold your center and practice having the shift that brings emotional freedom, follow the links below to join me at our class that begins next Saturday.
Namaste,
Steven FIsher
